Make It a Habit

Habits affect us.

Good habits impact us in good ways.

That's why it's so important to intentionally develop good habits.

(I could stop right there for today. But, as always, a good story goes with this observation.)

Most of you know that we are gearing up to become "Wedding Central" around the Hawley house. The initial excitement of the engagement; the squealing; the jumping up and down; the phone calls; the facebook status changing; the showing of the ring.............. All these things have taken place and NOW (cue loud reverberation) the planning begins.

Meagan's birthday is December 20th. Most years we tried to celebrate on October 20th so people would actually come to her party. Smile. The parental wedding anniversary is marked on December 30th. And of course, Christmas falls in there too.

She has spent her life observing that things get a bit squished/short-changed when celebrated near the end of the year.

Sooooo, she had rather strong feelings against planning a wedding for late fall or early winter. (Nathan's birthday is in September.)

July seemed the best time in her thinking. In fact, she and Nathan were pretty settled on July 23th. Until...........we started searching out venues to accommodate an outdoor ceremony; in FL; in July; with more than 150 guests!

Panic started pushing in around the edges.

Enter lifetime habit.

Meagan has a habit of stopping in the middle of a panic moment and looking up scripture on the matter at hand. This serves a dual purpose:

• re-directing focus
• feeding better thinking

So yesterday afternoon, she took a few precious planning moments and starting looking for scriptures on JOY. She didn't want to miss the joy of planning her wedding by worrying over every single individual she needed to please and every detail she needed to work out. (Who can do all that anyway?! Smile.)

In the midst of her "copying and pasting" this beautiful kiss from heaven showed up from the hidden recesses of II Chronicles -

".....on the twenty-third day of the seventh month, he sent the people to their homes joyful and glad in heart for the good things the lord had done......"

(I realize the Jewish calendar was different but for us that meant - JULY 23RD! Smile.)

You can not make up such as this!!

Habits affect us.

Good habits impact us in good ways.

Choose to start a good habit - you may need it down the road.

I-95

Interstate 95 is, for our family, more than a main corridor for the eastern sea board!

(For those unfamiliar with this highway, it runs the length of the east from FL to NY and beyond.)

During our years as evangelists, I-95 was the starting point for most of our journeys. It has also served for decades as a ribbon connecting family living in FL to family living in NC. Mom and Dad Hawley live just off the first exit there in the great metropolis of Dunn.

And who knew that we would also need this thoroughfare for connecting us to the Schreck family in Poughkeepsie, NY?!

Now, life moves on and soon another part of our family will live two hours east of I-95 in Manteo, NC. (That would be the Smith family, of course.)

So it was that this morning I texted two of my precious daughters. One on I-95 headed south and the other on I-95 headed north.

(Meagan and Nathan - traveling back from Manteo. Joy, John and Spencer - journeying toward Poughkeepsie. After they stop to see Grandma and Grandpa Hawley, of course! Smile.)

I texted Joy around 6:00 AM to see if they had made it safely to Dunn. (Overnight road trips seem to work better with children.) They were all getting ready for a much needed nap. We talked briefly about how odd it was that she and Meagan were both traveling the same road in opposite directions.

"What happened to the days when we told our three little blonds, 'Time to go, girls. Hop in the truck!' and we all hit the road together?" I asked.

"We've all grown up, Mom. I miss those days. Fun Times!" she texted back.

"Truth is, these are fun times too, Sweetie. Just different."

Yesterday while Joy tried to do laundry and pack, I did the babysitting. What a delightful trade-off! She had use of both hands and I got to snuggle! Win/Win.

I did the walk-and-jiggle; utilizing my nana-roll, of course. Smile. And finally young Mr. Schreck dozed off allowing me several delicious moments to study his features and ponder.

He is almost a miniature version of his handsome dad, John. But every so often I catch a glimpse of my own little Joy in his face. And in that moment, I'm twenty-five years old again; filled with wonder at new life!

I've known women who ache for a return to those days. Women who frequently and loudly lament - oh, how I wish I could go back to when they were just babies.

But many years ago, the Lord helped me to understand the importance of living in the moment - contentedly!

We can waste valuable time longing for yesterday and fearing tomorrow! (Wow, that's pretty good. Think I'll write that in the back of my Bible. Smile.)

Contentment serves like I-95. It connects us to the joy of yesterday while helping us journey on to the fulfillment of tomorrow. The critical point? We must choose to travel.

God promises to order our footsteps not our sitting down. Smile.

All those trips up and down I-95 and we had no idea that two of the young men we prayed for were essentially connected to us already.

Hmmmm. God never wastes anything, does He?!

Whether your travels today are literal or emotional, may they be abundantly blessed with contentment!



P.S. I have a HUGE list of things that to accomplish today. But my wonderful husband volunteered to take a chunk of those so I could blog. Thanks for the support, Sweetheart!

Full Friday

Some Fridays we have to work very hard to make it feel like a day off! Smile.

And I'll readily admit to you, dear readers that my thoughts today are incredibly random.

I woke early to the horrible news of the tsunami that has devastated Japan. Our thoughts and prayers go out to all the people impacted by such tragedy.

But before 9 AM, I had also learned of emotional tsunamis hitting the lives of several people I love and care about so very much.

The Red Cross, the U.N., the military, all the humanitarian aide of the world combined couldn't begin to offer the help/comfort needed by these dear friends.

So, I pray!

Sometimes that seems totally inadequate. My heart hurts with my friends and I want to rush to their aid. Prepare a meal. Fix the situation. Facilitate healing. Beat up an offending party! (Wait, are pastor's wives allowed to say that out loud?! Smile.)

SOMETHING! ANYTHING!!

But none of those options are mine. The one thing I can do is talk to the Father about the ones hurting and remind myself of a few important points:

• He loves them even more than I do!
• He warned about trouble in this world. But encouraged us to "be of good cheer; I have overcome the world!"
• He promises to hear when we call!
• He is the only One able to offer true help/comfort!
• He constantly watches for opportunities to demonstrate His love!

And when all is said and done, hope is found in thoughts like these.

Frank and I were privileged to meet Rev. Franklin Graham on Wednesday. What an incredible honor just to shake his hand and speak a few words with him.

His countenance was sharp and his voice exuded quiet humility. You just knew, this is a man who understands his role in the kingdom of God.

He has surely seen some of the most horrific conditions of our world. And his upbringing charged him with a desire to help. But even the most compassionate among us can only do so much - the rest is up to God.

This is by no means a license to do nothing!

But real peace is found in doing what we can, then trusting that God will handle the rest with HIS wisdom.

Didn't mean to make this a sermon by any means. However just because I can't go to Japan and wrap a blanket around the shoulders of a broken member of humanity, doesn't mean I have NO way to help.

I can pray! Won't you join me?

Nana-roll Dilemma

Spencer loves being outdoors.

(Just in case you're new to "Embrace the Grace", Spencer would be the first installment of the Schreck-Hawley lineage. Our amazing grandson!)

It has been reported that even when he works up a really good cry - which is rare, I assure you - stepping outdoors silences him almost immediately.

So yesterday it was Nana's turn to employ the "walk-and-jiggle" in the back yard. (No, that isn't a new brand of infant carrier.)

It's the old-fashioned version of comforting. Snuggle crying baby, walk around the yard, sing, bounce, try not to topple over. Repeat until baby gets bored and stops crying. Return baby to sleep-deprived parents who say, "How ever did you manage that?!" Smile.

I've discovered unused muscles that long ago thought they were safely retired. Not anymore!

And I've discovered that God in His foresight provided me with a most useful Nana-roll!

"A what?!" you ask.

A NANA-ROLL!

(If you're over 50, perhaps you have one as well and just weren't aware of its purpose.)

My Nana-roll is located just above my waste line and is the perfect spot for parking a baby behind upon.

As I worked on my "walk-and-jiggle" form yesterday, I realized that the thing I've despised; the part of my maturing body that I've tried to eradicate; the additional roll of "love" that I've camouflaged, is there for a reason!

Grandmas need these rolls in order to properly snuggle, nurture and spoil their grandchildren.

(I will, however, draw the line when Spencer asks to play with any extra skin around my neck or on the back of my arm. That's just wrong!)

So, I titled this post Nana-roll Dilemma because I'm faced with a real problem.

It's true that I'm now a Nana and very happy in that role. But I'm also soon to be M.O.B. - "Mother of the Bride" again. And you know the kind of dress Diane Keaton wore in the movie Father of the Bride.

Unfortunately, current M.O.B. fashions do NOT make allowances for Nana-rolls! Unless of course I choose some droopy, mu-mu-esque something or other.

I'm walking daily and watching my caloric intake diligently. But while Frank wants a cutsie M.O.B. as his date for the wedding, Spencer needs a regular sort of Nana with the necessary "Nana-roll" intact!

What's a girl to do?!

Any suggestions or thoughts you may have on this topic will be greatly appreciated! Smile.



I'll close with a portion of scripture that was most timely for me early this morning. And as I've pondered it, I felt that there may be one or more readers who would benefit from this same reminder.

"The Lord answered Moses, 'Is the Lord's arm too short? You will now see whether or not what I say will come true for you.' " That's Numbers 11:23, just in case you need to underline it like I did! Have a great day.

Two Things

Here you go:

1. Becky Smith (of "Smithellaneous" fame) linked my rather lengthy account of the engaging of our two offspring to her highly acclaimed blog. She encouraged her many readers to indulge us both by taking in every last word.

They did just that! And many left comments. (Comments are like sweet nectar to the hummingbird-heart of every blogger.) I eagerly clicked on the comment section and found that "Bec" from SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA had read my post.

(Now, I would have supposed that Bec was visiting a friend in TN or NC or FL but she said - right on her comment - ".....here I sit in Sydney (my emphasis), reading the story and tears are running down my face......")

I've always been curious about Australia and have dreamed about visiting some day. How amazing that through technology, my words have gotten there and have even elicited emotion! Wow!!

Thanks Bec for your kind comment!



2. To all my dear friends in the medical world:

• Thank you for your hard work and diligence!
• Thank you for studying and staying informed!
• Thank you for genuinely caring about your patients!

However -

• The rest of us do not have your experience nor your frame of reference.
• Even the smallest of outpatient procedures can seem frightening to us.
• If it involves: scalpels, needles, or nakedness be assured, I'm NOT comfortable! Smile.

I found myself the unwilling participant in just such a procedure Friday. Anxiety had built through the week and by Thursday evening, I was closing in on all out panic. We left for the hospital before daybreak Friday; completed all the necessary checking-in; then moved to the pre-surgery waiting area.

I should have suspected trouble when ten minutes before my procedure was scheduled to begin, they still hadn't called me back.

Frank walked to the desk and requested information.

"Oh, we thought Mrs. Hawley was already back here!" Not a good sign AT ALL!!

"Everything is okay, Mrs. Hawley. We'll get you right in. Just step into this freezer we call a bathroom. Take off every article of camouflage clothing. Put on this paper thin fabric we call a gown (leaving you totally exposed in the hinder parts). Walk out here where all the other terrified patients can stare at you. And oh, by the way, even though you've had nothing to drink since midnight - tinkle in this cup, won't you?"

SIGH! And again I say - S.I.G.H.!!

I never knew that inability to comply with such a simple request could leave me feeling like such a failure.

The knock at the door (like I was TWO) nearly reduced me to tears...... like a two year old. I had to shiver my way over to a gurney, get hooked up to an IV bag, and WAIT.

Someone asked if I wanted my husband to come back which helped. But you can totally hear when people stand by those curtains and softly say things like, "I know. I know! We are still waiting."

And it does NOT help when you step in and say things like, "Being nervous usually makes us want to go sooner!" "Did you try turning on the water?" "You've taken on half a bag of fluid, Mrs. Hawley." "The kidneys produce fluid even when we don't think they do!"

The final straw was the red-haired, male tech who peeked in while clutching the two curtains to either side of his pointy face and offered this comment in a sing-song voice, "Still haven't been able to tinkle, Mrs. Hawley?!"

If I'd had a metal bed pan, I would have hit him square in the head!

Well, success was finally mine. We moved on to the procedure room where someone gave me something that had me sound asleep in two point seven seconds. (Does that come in an over the counter form?!)

Lunch time found me home, cuddling on the couch with Gracie, enjoying copious quantities of doting by my precious husband.

And I guess that if it made you laugh out loud, it was worth it! Smile.

The (Real) Proposal

(Warning: Extremely L.O.N.G. post - but totally worth the read!)


Oh, the wrangling.

Oh, the story-telling.

Oh, the (dare I say it) out right DECEPTION - that went on around the Hawley household last week!

"To what could you possibly be referring?" you may ask. (So glad you did; that's why I blog. Smile.)

Well, it seems that a certain young man - Mr. Nathan Andrew Smith - had determined that February 26, 2011 would be the very best day to declare his undying love for a certain young woman - Ms. Meagan Elizabeth Hawley.

And after spending almost two years observing another man who is an absolute EXPERT at surprise execution - Mr. Frank Hawley - Nathan asked for help.

(Which made glad the heart of the daddy and exemplified a teachable heart in the boyfriend. BIG win all the way around; how many young men are confident enough to ask for help? See what I mean?! Smile.)

Besides, Nate also knows that Frank is the only other man in the world with his same perspective - "Nothing is too good for Meagan!"

"And so it was that the days were accomplished that she should be proposed to....." Oh, wait. That's from an even bigger story! (Can you tell I'm a little giddy with joy?)

By late January, Nathan had his ring.

An open weekend was identified and locked in.

That's when the planning commenced.

Nathan would tell Frank what he wanted and Frank would go to work trying to iron out the details. It really was such fun watching the two of them try to make surreptitious calls and text one another without being discovered.

Men accomplish incredible things when they put their minds to it!!

A friend of ours had recently purchased a home on a lake with a lovely gazebo right on the water's edge. Frank took Nathan to scout it out as a prospective location. Perfect!

Now to the plot.

Nathan wanted her to suspect nothing right up to the very moment. His plan - brilliantly concocted - was to take her on a series of dates through February that would throw her off.

(He had already told her sometime back that he would never propose on Valentine's Day. Too predictable for his taste.)

Restaurant dates have been rare for these two frugal young people. So three in one month set Meagan's head spinning.

"Do you think he'll propose tonight?" was a constant question while talking with her sisters.

Dad came alongside his co-conspirator and declared, "Nathan won't be asking any serious questions until he talks with me FIRST!"

Of course, Meagan had no way of knowing that that conversation had already taken place in December. Chivalry lives!

Nathan told Meagan that on Friday they were going on a pretty big date to Orlando. Dinner and a show.

She borrowed a lovely blouse from a friend. Her sisters were all on hand to do hair and make-up. (When I say sisters, that includes Amanda.) Nana gladly tended Spencer during the prep time. Pictures were taken before the departure of the handsome couple.

Everyone waited with baited breath for their return. (Except Dad and I; we knew there would be no ring on Friday night.)

Nathan (who slept on our couch that night) woke with a grin on his face Saturday morning. He said she was very quiet on the way home. The plot thickens.........

Saturday rolled in with all its activities. Frank and I made excuses and headed to the gazebo to hang lights; set up a CD player with pre-selected music; prepare a small table and chairs; etc., etc.

Our friends got into the fun with us. They pressure-washed the gazebo and checked the electrical outlets. Even their seven year old son (who was eagerly anticipating the big event) offered his opinion of what looked most romantic. Young love inspires us all.

Nathan picked Meagan up around 5:00 for dinner and pottery painting. (Meagan isn't much for movies.)

There was MUCH texting between Frank and Nate as we were the set-up crew in charge of candle-lighting, fruit and cheese tray delivering, and all other last minute ambiance creating.

The evening was lovely; conversation delightful; the meal delicious. Meagan had no idea what was going on!

Nate was totally pleased until............

Meagan became uncharacteristically detailed about her piece of pottery. Nathan said he'd never seen her so meticulous and S.L.O.W. before.

Meagan, on the other hand, couldn't understand Nathan's rush to complete the piece.

She told us later that she thought, "It's only 8:30. Are we getting old or what?!" Smile.

Thirty miles away, we blew out the candles a second time and re-covered the fruit tray.

FINALLY........

They finished the pottery and Nathan proceeded to spin his web.

He explained that he appreciated Meagan's patience while he worked diligently saving for the engagement ring. "It shouldn't be much longer now," he said. (HeHeHe!)

"But I wanted to have some fun memories while we're waiting. One of them that I had for Valentine's Day wasn't ready until now. Please put on this blindfold and I'll take you there."

Meagan was a little put off with the idea of being blindfolded but the request came from the love of her life sooooooo she agreed.

Light the candles!

Nathan texted just as we expected their arrival to report that Meagan had asked to stop at McDonalds for a potty break.

Put out the candles.

Next Text: "Okay. We're on our way!"

Relight the candles! Turn on the CD! Run like crazy for the house - there they are!!!!!

We watched from inside the home of our friends as Nathan carefully transferred his "blinded" sweetheart to a golf cart and drove down to the lake.

He slowly walked her around the path; positioned her facing the gazebo; then knelt just out of our view in front of her before telling her to remove the blindfold.

(He told us later that he had the ring box already open.)

They were too far away for us to hear anything. But sound wasn't really needed as we watched her stand in shock; begin to jump up and down; do a little dance of joy; then bend over crying.

Tears filled every eye in the house, too. Sigh.

Mom and Dad slipped away without detection. The family went on to bed. We left them to their privacy and to fully enjoy the moment.

The sisters (who had no fore-warning) were summoned to our house around midnight and we all took an hour to squeal, admire the ring and listen to the story as they told it. (Well, mostly Meagan told it and Nathan beamed!)

The only thing left to say is:
"Well done, Mr. Smith. Well done!"

Reading Habits

I love to read!

As a kid filling out early job applications, I often listed reading as a favorite hobby. (Does that really qualify? Not sure. But I didn't play softball and I certainly wasn't a cheerleader! So, reading it was. Smile.)

But this morning gave me an all time high reason for reading on a regular basis. You see........

Dad came down for a visit this week to meet his new great-grandson. What fun! But as his single suitcase comes in the door, so do all the thoughts and memories of who isn't with him. Sigh.

Last night he fried fish for dinner; a family tradition when we get together. And afterward, we took lots of pictures with Spencer.

I was fine until we did the "generations" picture. You know - Great grandpa, Grandma, Mama, Baby - four generations. My heart turned to mush knowing that Mom should be in the pictures. Meagan caught my discreet request that Mom's quilt be in them at least.

(What does all this have to do with reading? I'm coming back around, hang on. Smile.)

My heart seemed full of emotional soup all night long. Changes with church, changes in our family, doctor's visits, prayer concerns, miracle-watching. Stir, stir, stir.

I woke at five and finally got up around 6:00 to find some quiet from all the loud thinking.

Good habits are a great thing! Out of habit I made coffee; grabbed my Bible and journal; made room for Gracie on the love seat; and settled in.

My Bible just happened to fall open to April 15th where I had this underlined, "The Lord said to Joshua, 'Do not be afraid of them, because by this time tomorrow I will hand them over to Israel.' " Beside it I had written, "Don't fear; see a good outcome!"

I love to read many different genres. But my favorite reading involves promises made and encouragement given by a God big enough to do something about them!

Here's to seeing a good outcome on the horizon before it fully appears. How about you?