Thursday, December 15, 2011

Male Sickness Cycle

Frank had out-patient surgery on Monday.

Nothing major, thankfully. But still, the dread of all the unknown - needles; probing; exposing; anesthetizing; cutting; stitching. You know, all that goes with what used to be a week in the hospital and is now considered "out patient" surgery.

I relived my appreciation for all people medically inclined on Monday. The Lakeland Regional Diagnostic and Surgical Center employs people who understand an important basic principle. While this is where they comfortably work and do life every single day - it is one SCARY place for the rest of us!

I was careful to express my appreciation to as many of the staff as possible while walking through the experience with Frank. We had only one humorous encounter and that was with the recovery nurse.

Apparently, Frank decided he wanted OUT of the bed they had him in and he began moving in that direction determinedly!

Now some would describe my husband as a teddy bear. But not Linda the recovery nurse! She kept calling to him, "Frank. Frank! You can't get up yet! Do you hear me, Frank?!"

When I got back to the recovery area, Linda tried to describe what had been going on. She looked across the drowsy patient, made intentional eye contact with me, tapped her own temple several times and whispered, "He wasn't with me!"

I stifled a chuckle and said, "But he's okay now?" She assured me he was.

About this time, Frank started looking up at me with a suspicious expression and asking repeatedly, "I'm being a good patient, right?

He appeared slightly drunk (although he's never been drunk) and had great trouble holding open his eyes. Helping him get dressed to leave was an adventure too!

We've now experienced the "Male Sickness Cycle" multiple times.

(I must preface this portion of the post by explaining that Frank has no equal when it comes to nursing the girls or me. When we're sick, he covers every detail and offers gentle care. Treasure!)

But even the most amazing men seem to struggle with the Male Sickness Cycle. It goes something like this:
  • I'm tough! I don't need anyone taking care of me!
  • Wow! Did you see these stitches?!
  • Just how deep do you think they had to cut me?
  • Can I have a glass of ______?
  • Can you hand me the remote?
  • I don't want to be a bother!
  • Can you get a blanket for me?
  • Could you rub my head? My feet?
  • Should I take a nap now?
  • Isn't it time for another pain pill?
  • I'm not being a baby, am I!

And so it goes.

Today Frank is back in the office for a few hours. And with the week-end we have coming up, he has to re-engage pretty quickly. I must admit that caring for him has been a privilege. And while he has made me smile several times, he really hasn't been a baby!

Prayer Request!

We have a local ministry called The Mission that provides Christmas gifts for disadvantaged families in Winter Haven. They recently asked our church to host the children this year as they attend the event. Such a privilege!

John, Kristin and Amanda have been quickly preparing for the 500 children they told us to expect. Games. Inflatables. Candy, of course candy! And a fifteen minute children's service every hour.

Last week we discovered that it would be 500 Families! An estimated 1500-2000 CHILDREN! Our entire church is pitching in to help but we could sure use your prayers this Saturday from 9-3:00. I'll give a report; but thanks in advance!


  1. Yeah, the MSC (I like that)! I think any female who's had a male in their life of any relation knows this illness! Well, God wired the genders and males, in general, just didn't get the connection between the stripped wire and the fuse for enduring their own illnesses! And apparently male illnesses are a competition!(Imagine my hands thrown up Italian-style-what-are-ya-gonna-do!) Will pray for quick healing for Frank...from the surgery. :)

    Oh my gosh, wish I could come set up, decorate and be part of this party! What an incredible blessing this will be to those receiving and those giving! Can't wait to hear about it!

    Buon Natale!

  2. I've been following and enjoying your musings for a long time now and was surprised when you mentioned Amanda. Did she not marry and move away? Could you please give an update? I keep checking her blog, but there has not been a word since July.

  3. I'll be praying. They might need plan C to pull this one off. Plan B might not cover it!