Warning: If you enjoy meticulous house cleaning practices - Do Not Read This Post!! It will cause you great alarm and might even make you lose sleep due to its graphic descriptions! On second thought, if you are like my Kristin (a cleaning whirlwind) read on. It will probably serve to delight you with your own abilities by comparison!
Happy Thanksgiving!!
(If you're reading from another country or culture, please ignore that opening!)
I'm aware that I should probably write a lovely post about gratitude and counting our blessings and choosing to be thankful. Hopefully, you're already doing all of these as part of preparing for the Christmas season. But that's not today's topic.
Today I would like to confess to you that I hate cleaning my bathroom!
There. I said it. Plain and simple. I've always hated cleaning my bathroom.
I've worked multiple jobs that required me to clean the bathrooms of others. A restaurant bathroom. And even a public bathroom once. (Cleaning the church bathroom occasionally is just part of being in church leadership.) Those tasks never really bothered me.
But cleaning my own bathroom takes the determination of a Himalayan mountain climber! You've set out to conquer this monster and conquer it you will!
Now, some of you may be envisioning a large en suite sporting double sinks, a garden tub and perhaps even a bedette. Nope.
The bathroom I'm referencing is rather small by American standards. One sink, one toilet, one stand-up shower. More like the English-style water closet. Not much square footage at all. And it took me an hour and a half to clean it today!
During those ninety minutes of grueling effort, I made a few discoveries. (If you are squeamish, please remember that I tried to warn you!)
Bathroom Discoveries:
1. The counter is two shades lighter than I thought. It only appeared that dark because of the thick layers of hair spray accumulated there.
2. The grout in my shower is white, not gray.
3. The shower door does NOT have a decorative, cloudy effect as I had supposed.
4. The rubber stripping is light gray, not dark gray. And when you use a cloth to wipe away that much mold, the cloth is rendered useless and must be thrown into the trash.
5. The "shadow" under my bathroom cabinet was actually a pair of dust bunnies hopping around joyfully anytime the door opened or closed.
6. My toilet has multiple nooks and crannies that can only be conquered by a cleaner's willingness to assume the "hugging" position.
7. Hairspray also compromises the cleanliness of the wall and floor tiles directly opposite the mirror. "Swiping" with a clean cloth isn't sufficient - scraping is necessary for its removal.
8. Speaking of hair....... I kept finding and kept finding and kept finding strands of my dark brown locks. So much hair that I'm sure it would have qualified for a small wig! I couldn't see the gray hairs but I could sense them mocking me as they lurked just beyond the brown ones.
9. The shower stall is a place I only ever "see" without appropriate eye wear. Who wears glasses or contact lenses in the shower? Not me! (Refer back to point 2.)
10. It's a miracle that spontaneous combustion had not already taken place due to the excessive amounts of dust clinging to the coverings of my light bulbs.
Because some of you are empathetic, you're thinking, "Oh, Sheri! It couldn't have been that bad." It was worse!
A couple of readers are shaking their heads in total disbelief. Believe it, my friend!
Some of you (who love to clean) are just aching for an opportunity to come teach me the finer art of "staying ahead" of the project. Won't work!
I've read countless articles and books. Compiled extensive check lists. Even created a "cleaning box" filled with 3X5 cards that rotated projects monthly in an effort to keep the uninspired cleaner interested. Lost the box!
The only consolation of the day is this - the bathroom should hopefully stay clean long enough for my dad and his wife to come for a visit this week. And that causes a deep sigh of contentment.
Of course, I gleaned several object lessons while working on my project today.
1. Proper evaluation takes place only when we see the situation clearly! I look at my shower and counters multiple times each day. But without the help of my glasses, everything appeared just fine to me. We all need the help of an objective friend from time to time. Or a clear look through the perspective of Scripture occasionally. Those who think they need no help are probably a couple of shades from true.
2. No one likes exposing their faults! I would much rather tell you I learned these lessons while gardening or while caring for my practically perfect grandchildren. Having to admit that I don't clean my bathroom as often as I should is humbling; embarrassing. I don't mind admitting that I even feel a little vulnerable. But if honestly admitting my faults encourages someone else to get up and try again, then it's worth my discomfort. Others relate more easily to our failures than to our successes.
3. After we "address our issues" there comes a wonderful flood of peace and contentment. I always waste energy dreading the day that my bathroom must be attacked with scrub brush and cleansers. But once tackled, it seldom ever is as difficult as I imagined. And when the task is finished, I feel such relief and accomplishment. Mary Poppins says, "The job begun is half done!" Is there a task that you've been dreading? May I encourage you to get to it?! Clean that clutter. Make that phone call. Offer that forgiveness. Then sit back and wait for the flood of contentment that surely follows.
Well, I have a Christmas tree lying in my living room floor. Ornament boxes litter every open space. And a half dozen nativity scenes need unpacking.
With company due to arrive tomorrow, I'd better get to it! Whew! Sure glad I've already cleaned the bathroom!
Blessings!
Saturday, November 28, 2015
Monday, November 16, 2015
Village of Missionaries
Twenty-four hours!
That's all it takes for a phone call; a bit of news; a choice; a life change! Just twenty-four short hours!
Last week, that's about what happened in our family village. On Tuesday evening, we got the call that a member of our church missions team was no longer able to make the upcoming trip. We needed a replacement - quickly!
Details? The trip was for ten days to work with our sister church in El Salvador. We needed someone with a passport; strength and inclination to work hard; a flexible spirit and the ability to decide right now.
As I headed out the door for another meeting, I passed by Nathan. "Hey, Nathan! Want to go to El Salvador?" My question dripped with sarcasm.
"You mean the trip starting Thursday morning?!" He chuckled.
"That's the one," I answered. "They leave in a little over twenty-four hours and we've just had someone drop out."
"What would it cost?" His curiosity got the better of him.
"Nothing. It's already been paid for. These trips are set up on such a tight budget that everyone knows their trip is transferable but not refundable." I reached for the door, then casually added, "If you think you'd be interested call me right away. We're working to compile a short list of people who might be able to make it happen."
That's how it started.
And in just over twenty-four hours, Meagan and Nathan were standing in the predawn darkness with all the other team members and their families as Pastor prayed over them.
However, that certainly isn't all the story.
Nathan had a serious desire to go and work with the team. Actually, he and Meagan have prayed about him going for a couple of years now. It just never seemed to be the right time - what with pregnancies and deliveries and such. Massively important moments for dads not to miss!
Meagan was well aware that this trip was a heart desire for her husband. And although she had one little boy hanging onto her leg and one little girl clinging to her shoulder as they discussed it, Meagan knew this wasn't something to pass over lightly.
The financial expense of the trip was covered. But that isn't all that's involved in travel. They had to look realistically at what it would cost them in time and schedule changes and missed events.
Meagan and Kristin teach music at their school, too. The first big performance will take place while Nathan is away. There was a fall festival. Nathan plays drums for church. A little boy looks for Daddy to play 'frih-bee' every afternoon.
They started making calls to his work, cancelling appointments, re-arranging commitments - all the while praying the pieces would fall in to place.
"Sure, that's totally possible!" Work.
"No problem! I'll be happy to do that in your place." Brothers.
"Yes, I'll cover for you and help Meagan with the children." Sisters.
"We can switch our schedule around and help with delivery, pick-up and play time." Grandparents
Meagan shed some tears as Nathan drove away Thursday morning. But he left with her complete backing. He also had the assurance that an entire village of "home missionaries" are carrying on with his little family in his absence.
The work Nathan and the team are doing in El Salvador is demanding both physically and emotionally. I know, I've been there. A totally different culture and schedule. Unusual foods, primitive living conditions, inability to communicate.
It can get overwhelming rather quickly if you don't keep the end result in mind. Our team is there to help equip our sister church in sharing God's love with children who need to know Someone cares!
Meagan and the rest of us are serving here at home to make it possible for them to be there. (In fact, I'll send Frank off to join them tomorrow.) Other missionaries of the village gave financially so the team could be there to equip the church in sharing God's love.
As we've watched reports about the horrors in Paris this week. It's given us greater resolve. I guess some might say we're radical. But our mission brings life!
When our team leaves El Salvador on Saturday, people will be sad to say good-bye. And the community will be left richer than when they first arrived. Our intention is to Give; not to Take. Our Heavenly Father loves and cares for each precious child the world overlooks!
And when you put Nathan's trip into that picture frame, it's easier to see why Meagan said, "Yes! You go. We'll be fine until you get home!"
Proud of Nathan! Proud of the village of home missionaries supporting him! Thankful that we have such Good News and so much Love to share with our world!
That's all it takes for a phone call; a bit of news; a choice; a life change! Just twenty-four short hours!
Last week, that's about what happened in our family village. On Tuesday evening, we got the call that a member of our church missions team was no longer able to make the upcoming trip. We needed a replacement - quickly!
Details? The trip was for ten days to work with our sister church in El Salvador. We needed someone with a passport; strength and inclination to work hard; a flexible spirit and the ability to decide right now.
As I headed out the door for another meeting, I passed by Nathan. "Hey, Nathan! Want to go to El Salvador?" My question dripped with sarcasm.
"You mean the trip starting Thursday morning?!" He chuckled.
"That's the one," I answered. "They leave in a little over twenty-four hours and we've just had someone drop out."
"What would it cost?" His curiosity got the better of him.
"Nothing. It's already been paid for. These trips are set up on such a tight budget that everyone knows their trip is transferable but not refundable." I reached for the door, then casually added, "If you think you'd be interested call me right away. We're working to compile a short list of people who might be able to make it happen."
That's how it started.
And in just over twenty-four hours, Meagan and Nathan were standing in the predawn darkness with all the other team members and their families as Pastor prayed over them.
However, that certainly isn't all the story.
Nathan had a serious desire to go and work with the team. Actually, he and Meagan have prayed about him going for a couple of years now. It just never seemed to be the right time - what with pregnancies and deliveries and such. Massively important moments for dads not to miss!
Meagan was well aware that this trip was a heart desire for her husband. And although she had one little boy hanging onto her leg and one little girl clinging to her shoulder as they discussed it, Meagan knew this wasn't something to pass over lightly.
The financial expense of the trip was covered. But that isn't all that's involved in travel. They had to look realistically at what it would cost them in time and schedule changes and missed events.
Meagan and Kristin teach music at their school, too. The first big performance will take place while Nathan is away. There was a fall festival. Nathan plays drums for church. A little boy looks for Daddy to play 'frih-bee' every afternoon.
They started making calls to his work, cancelling appointments, re-arranging commitments - all the while praying the pieces would fall in to place.
"Sure, that's totally possible!" Work.
"No problem! I'll be happy to do that in your place." Brothers.
"Yes, I'll cover for you and help Meagan with the children." Sisters.
"We can switch our schedule around and help with delivery, pick-up and play time." Grandparents
Meagan shed some tears as Nathan drove away Thursday morning. But he left with her complete backing. He also had the assurance that an entire village of "home missionaries" are carrying on with his little family in his absence.
The work Nathan and the team are doing in El Salvador is demanding both physically and emotionally. I know, I've been there. A totally different culture and schedule. Unusual foods, primitive living conditions, inability to communicate.
It can get overwhelming rather quickly if you don't keep the end result in mind. Our team is there to help equip our sister church in sharing God's love with children who need to know Someone cares!
Meagan and the rest of us are serving here at home to make it possible for them to be there. (In fact, I'll send Frank off to join them tomorrow.) Other missionaries of the village gave financially so the team could be there to equip the church in sharing God's love.
As we've watched reports about the horrors in Paris this week. It's given us greater resolve. I guess some might say we're radical. But our mission brings life!
When our team leaves El Salvador on Saturday, people will be sad to say good-bye. And the community will be left richer than when they first arrived. Our intention is to Give; not to Take. Our Heavenly Father loves and cares for each precious child the world overlooks!
And when you put Nathan's trip into that picture frame, it's easier to see why Meagan said, "Yes! You go. We'll be fine until you get home!"
Proud of Nathan! Proud of the village of home missionaries supporting him! Thankful that we have such Good News and so much Love to share with our world!
Monday, November 9, 2015
Daily Direction
"Noni, what was your fahvrot paht of the festibol?" Spencer, Abby and I were walking down the hallway at church yesterday morning. He already has the confident stride of his dad; just with shorter legs.
He was monitoring Abby's progress; pushing open doors; casually conversing like any forty-year-old would have. How did you like the fall festival we all worked so diligently to provide for our community yesterday? What was your favorite part? Did you meet anyone new? Me? Oh, I loved the bounce house myself!
These kids absolutely amaze me. And their parents amaze me even more! When did they all become so intuitive; so smart; so kind; so..... Oh, wait a minute. Someone just experienced a full-blown toddler melt down; reality remains. But they still amaze me!
I was remembering the conversation with Spencer this morning and a huge smile came on my face. What a sweet way to begin my work! And joy was needed for the tasks I had mapped out.
First on the list was to work on a vine that's gotten out of control. We have a lovely passion flower growing on our new trellis that I wrote about several weeks ago. (Yes, things are still growing in central FL. In fact, while the rest of the country is enjoying cold snaps and sipping hot chocolate, we're sweltering with temperatures well into the 90's.)
Frank started training the vine as soon as he planted it. Carefully weaving new growth in and out on the cross bars of the trellis. Lack of rain and lack of time to water it had slowed the growth. I only noticed last night that several shoots were waving about in an unruly manner. Note to self: take care of that first thing in the morning.
The passion vine produces a lovely flower with various petals that have been used since the 1500's to illustrate the crucifixion of Christ. In some regions, it grows as a wild vine.
It was my mom who first introduced me to the fragrant beauty. The one she carefully cultivated in her flower box nearest the front door was greatly prized. It brought her joy just in its existence.
As I worked with our vine on the trellis, I quickly realized how ingeniously it's designed for wandering. Tendrils shoot out reaching for a new location. Equipped with a slightly sticky residue, they tap a new spot and immediately begin forming a tight coil.
This works great until we miss a few days of training and allow them to grow any way they want.
Some of the tendrils had to be broken off. One large portion of the vine had even been "captured" by a downward tendril and was actually growing back toward the ground! The more I tugged, snapped and re-positioned the vine, the more I realized this work needs to be done almost daily!
It would have been much easier if I hadn't waited so long.
And in that moment, I thought again of my precious Spencer, Abby, Noah. Those babies are in a critical training stage of life. Just like the passion flower, they bring great joy just by being here. But training is still vital.
Children are ingeniously designed for growth and exploration. It's in their DNA! They reach out testing first one experience then another. And just like the tendrils on my vine, things often "stick" to our children before we realize it.
One of my favorite stories is about the frazzled mom who had hustled around all day preparing her home and a meal for several dinner guests. When everyone (including the guests) had finally been seated around the table, the mom invited her five year old to say grace.
"I'm not sure what to say," the little boy responded with wide eyes.
"Just say what you've heard mom pray, Sweetheart." Mom patted her darling and everyone bowed their heads.
They all smiled as the angelic voice began softly at first but finished strong, "Dear Lord............ WHY DID I INVITE ALL THESE PEOPLE TO DINNER?!"
Don't be fooled; the little ones around you hear and see everything!
Changes come to them so quickly that the easiest way to direct their growth is to work with them daily. How easily a life can be turned in the wrong direction if we aren't keeping a diligent eye open! How easily children get coiled into relationships or behaviors that never would have had a chance if only someone had caught it early! They need daily direction.
My vine will quickly change into a wandering weed without proper training and intervention. But given careful and intentional cultivation, it will produce fragrant blooms that we'll enjoy for years to come.
May that be so of our children and yours as well!
He was monitoring Abby's progress; pushing open doors; casually conversing like any forty-year-old would have. How did you like the fall festival we all worked so diligently to provide for our community yesterday? What was your favorite part? Did you meet anyone new? Me? Oh, I loved the bounce house myself!
These kids absolutely amaze me. And their parents amaze me even more! When did they all become so intuitive; so smart; so kind; so..... Oh, wait a minute. Someone just experienced a full-blown toddler melt down; reality remains. But they still amaze me!
I was remembering the conversation with Spencer this morning and a huge smile came on my face. What a sweet way to begin my work! And joy was needed for the tasks I had mapped out.
First on the list was to work on a vine that's gotten out of control. We have a lovely passion flower growing on our new trellis that I wrote about several weeks ago. (Yes, things are still growing in central FL. In fact, while the rest of the country is enjoying cold snaps and sipping hot chocolate, we're sweltering with temperatures well into the 90's.)
Frank started training the vine as soon as he planted it. Carefully weaving new growth in and out on the cross bars of the trellis. Lack of rain and lack of time to water it had slowed the growth. I only noticed last night that several shoots were waving about in an unruly manner. Note to self: take care of that first thing in the morning.
The passion vine produces a lovely flower with various petals that have been used since the 1500's to illustrate the crucifixion of Christ. In some regions, it grows as a wild vine.
It was my mom who first introduced me to the fragrant beauty. The one she carefully cultivated in her flower box nearest the front door was greatly prized. It brought her joy just in its existence.
As I worked with our vine on the trellis, I quickly realized how ingeniously it's designed for wandering. Tendrils shoot out reaching for a new location. Equipped with a slightly sticky residue, they tap a new spot and immediately begin forming a tight coil.
This works great until we miss a few days of training and allow them to grow any way they want.
Some of the tendrils had to be broken off. One large portion of the vine had even been "captured" by a downward tendril and was actually growing back toward the ground! The more I tugged, snapped and re-positioned the vine, the more I realized this work needs to be done almost daily!
It would have been much easier if I hadn't waited so long.
And in that moment, I thought again of my precious Spencer, Abby, Noah. Those babies are in a critical training stage of life. Just like the passion flower, they bring great joy just by being here. But training is still vital.
Children are ingeniously designed for growth and exploration. It's in their DNA! They reach out testing first one experience then another. And just like the tendrils on my vine, things often "stick" to our children before we realize it.
One of my favorite stories is about the frazzled mom who had hustled around all day preparing her home and a meal for several dinner guests. When everyone (including the guests) had finally been seated around the table, the mom invited her five year old to say grace.
"I'm not sure what to say," the little boy responded with wide eyes.
"Just say what you've heard mom pray, Sweetheart." Mom patted her darling and everyone bowed their heads.
They all smiled as the angelic voice began softly at first but finished strong, "Dear Lord............ WHY DID I INVITE ALL THESE PEOPLE TO DINNER?!"
Don't be fooled; the little ones around you hear and see everything!
Changes come to them so quickly that the easiest way to direct their growth is to work with them daily. How easily a life can be turned in the wrong direction if we aren't keeping a diligent eye open! How easily children get coiled into relationships or behaviors that never would have had a chance if only someone had caught it early! They need daily direction.
My vine will quickly change into a wandering weed without proper training and intervention. But given careful and intentional cultivation, it will produce fragrant blooms that we'll enjoy for years to come.
May that be so of our children and yours as well!
Monday, October 19, 2015
Needed Friendship
So, Frank and I are making new friends today. In a location where we’d rather not be. But
a place where friends are desperately needed and greatly appreciated, just the same.
He’s having a rather lengthy medical test done which requires lots of waiting. We arrived well before dawn but will still be sitting here through lunch we've been told. As we sit
patiently in the waiting area, people come and go.
We’re hapless victims forced to listen to one of those
constantly cycling news programs on the television in the corner. (I honestly think I could quote some of the
reports now.)
But the people-watching opportunities are limitless!
Oddly, one of the first people we met was another pastor of
our area. She was here to pray with
church members coming in for a similar test.
We chatted for a while; then she prayed and left.
We’ve become friends with the technician who was here when we first arrived. He has taken
special care to make sure Frank is well informed with every step. The nurses and even the desk staff are
smiling and offering polite conversation now.
Because many people are already fleeing the colder weather up north, an
abundance of different accents swirl around our ears. The air conditioning in this part of the
clinic has to stay nearly frigid because of the special equipment. A stack of blankets waits for the inevitable cold patients experience.
Varying ages, styles of dress, reading interests, reading
implements and even dispositions. It’s a
“people-watching” smorgasbord.
Some have family or friends waiting with them. One gentleman is obviously sight and hearing
impaired. It’s quite clear that his
attendant is being paid for his services.
Very little patience and certainly none of the tenderness or
attentiveness a family member would offer.
An older couple keeps sneaking nervous glances at one another. When they get caught, they smile reassuringly, pat hands lovingly, then go back to their reading material. Their mutual concern for one another is touching.
Several older men are waiting alone. I can’t help but wonder if they’re
widowed. Some have a practiced
appearance of nonchalance. But each one
has responded quickly when their name has been called. Anticipation can’t be camouflaged.
I’ve only spotted two ladies waiting alone. Women tend to be creatures of community.
We’ve even moved to the step of exchanging names with two
other patients. “George” is a military
veteran and well traveled. “Teresa” has
never lived outside this county. Both
interesting people.
The one over-riding element among all these people in the waiting area?
A palpable sense of tension.
“Tests” create a universal condition – uncertainty. If we already had answers we’d be on a different floor receiving treatment. This waiting area is reserved for those of us with questions. Lots of unanswered questions.
“Tests” create a universal condition – uncertainty. If we already had answers we’d be on a different floor receiving treatment. This waiting area is reserved for those of us with questions. Lots of unanswered questions.
Sitting here – totally helpless to make changes or to make
things move any faster – I’m aware that at our core, we human beings are all very
much the same.
Take away the masks we chose to wear. Put us in drafty hospital gowns. Ask us to lie on cold gurneys. And suddenly, we crave comfort – reassuring
touch, understanding looks, meaningful whispers – comfort.
Please note, the comfort needed in this place has nothing to
do with finances, physical appearance or social status. Whispers are free and often fleeting but
are absolutely priceless for a frightened heart.
Touches may come from an unattractive hand but the warmth provided is
all the same. A look that says, “I see
you!” can steady even the most tremulous soul.
George must have been nervous because he was very talkative. It didn’t take many comment exchanges for us
to get straight to the heart of things.
“I know some people don’t believe.
But I DO believe in God!” George's voice wavered slightly. He expected a response.
“So do I, George! And
more importantly, He believes in you!” I
whispered my encouragement. George
rubbed his nose nervously; pretty sure he swiped at a tear.
Just then, the technician called his name. George bolted up as quickly as his
eighty-year-old limbs would allow. He
looked back briefly and smiled. That
smile of gratitude made me glad I had listened so patiently.
Of course, I came today for Frank. But I think, just maybe, God used my presence in this uncertain place to create a needed
friendship for George, too.
Comfort is welcome in every corner of this world. Feel free to share some today.
Wednesday, September 30, 2015
Just Walking
We've lived in this house for almost ten years. That's a real record for us. The next most lengthy occupation was eight years in Asheville, NC.
Our home is modest by most standards. We're situated in a small grouping of homes with our very own cul-de-sac at the end. Our little association opens into a larger community of "neighborly" people.
For nine years, I've been walking down our street, out to the larger community, looping around and back home. Almost always the same route in the mornings and a bit different trek in the evenings.
My walking habits have varied through the years. Intensity and frequency depends largely on how close I might be to a wedding or reunion.
Oddly, I seldom ever take Gracie with me. "Tho' she be small, she thinks she be mighty!" And she has no hesitation picking fights with larger dogs lounging on their own piece of lawn.
Over the years, the girls and Frank have teased about my habit of waving or chatting with neighbors as I've passed by. Truth is, they've been ruthless in their teasing based on a "greeting gone wrong" experience.
It happened while we still lived in NC. I was urging them all (once again) to say hello when they spotted neighbors outside their homes. At that very moment a teaching opportunity arose. A man we seldom ever saw, stepped out onto his back porch.
I nodded at my little family with the all knowing mother nod that says, "Alright! Watch and learn."
The man next door reached over for his newspaper then stood up and looked directly at us. He paused for a split second. Perfect!
In my sweetest, most cheery southern-esque drawl I loudly chirped, "Good Morning! How are y'all doing?" (More mother-knows-best nodding ensued as we awaited his response.)
Imagine my shock when the fella scowled, growled something unintelligible, and shuffled back into his house. The dismissive slam of his porch door sent a clear message, "Leave me alone, you nosy lady!"
We all stood with eyes wide in disbelief. Suddenly, Frank and the girls burst into gales of uncontrollable laughter. He pulled my forlorn self into a comforting bear hug.
That one incident continues to lead to family members waving randomly at walls or fences and crooning, "How are y'all doing?!" Then everyone bursts into laughter.
Okay, I get it. Not everyone wants to be friendly. But I haven't let that one little obstacle stand in my way! My calling is clear - greet the neighbors and let them know you want to connect.
So as I walk, I wave and talk to those showing any interest whatsoever.
But I also pray. I pray over the homes of people I don't even know. I figure that if the Lord brings the house to my attention, there's a reason. The occupants may need courage or hope. Their marriage may be in trouble or their children may be struggling. He knows.
Believe it or not, when I say hello, some neighbors still give a response similar to that of the guy in Asheville. Some people hear me but turn and walk in the other direction. Some wave in return but quickly look away indicating to me, "Don't talk to me!"
I inadvertently called one neighbor "Steve" for a while. He stopped me one day and snapped, "KEITH!"
"What did you say?" I asked with my biggest, engaging smile.
"My name is KEITH! Not Steve." He glared at me.
"Oh, I'm so sorry. Um, I'll try to remember for next time I see you, Keith. Thanks." I walked away a little hurt and started repeating for myself, "Keith with teeth. Keith with teeth."
Word association games help me remember names. "Keith with teeth" worked beautifully. And about six months later, my short chats and quick hellos yielded a great opportunity. "Keith with teeth" had a serious family need. (Apparently all our nearest neighbors refer to Frank as "The Preacher.") Keith asked that Frank and I pray for his family.
We stopped and prayed right there in the driveway!
One of the "look away" fellas finally waved last year. I considered that as another major break-through. Then about six months ago, we learned his mother had died and that he felt totally alone.
It hasn't led to dinner yet (he turned that invitation down.) But he does greet us first now. Some of our Sunday evening strolls have turned into lengthy conversations about hunting or fishing or travel; whatever is on his mind. And he even went so far as to tease a little recently.
I have a list on my refrigerator of all the neighbors I can name. It reminds me to pray for them.
Faith is a special needs student I met on an early morning walk. Extremely shy, it was hard for her to look at me the first few times I said hello.
But eventually, I would round the corner and find her waving eagerly and calling out, "Hello! Hello! How are you?" She would almost bubble. Faith and her family moved away this summer. I find myself still praying for her as I pass her former home.
Who knew that just walking could yield so many opportunities to let people know they matter? Oh, wait. I think there was Someone else who discovered this form of ministry long before me. Like 2000 years ago.
Try taking a look around your own "neighborhood" with new eyes. It doesn't matter whether you're more comfortable with Hello! Hi Y'all! Howdy! or a simple Good Morning! The important thing is that you just walk......and find a way to let others know you care.
Our home is modest by most standards. We're situated in a small grouping of homes with our very own cul-de-sac at the end. Our little association opens into a larger community of "neighborly" people.
For nine years, I've been walking down our street, out to the larger community, looping around and back home. Almost always the same route in the mornings and a bit different trek in the evenings.
My walking habits have varied through the years. Intensity and frequency depends largely on how close I might be to a wedding or reunion.
Oddly, I seldom ever take Gracie with me. "Tho' she be small, she thinks she be mighty!" And she has no hesitation picking fights with larger dogs lounging on their own piece of lawn.
Over the years, the girls and Frank have teased about my habit of waving or chatting with neighbors as I've passed by. Truth is, they've been ruthless in their teasing based on a "greeting gone wrong" experience.
It happened while we still lived in NC. I was urging them all (once again) to say hello when they spotted neighbors outside their homes. At that very moment a teaching opportunity arose. A man we seldom ever saw, stepped out onto his back porch.
I nodded at my little family with the all knowing mother nod that says, "Alright! Watch and learn."
The man next door reached over for his newspaper then stood up and looked directly at us. He paused for a split second. Perfect!
In my sweetest, most cheery southern-esque drawl I loudly chirped, "Good Morning! How are y'all doing?" (More mother-knows-best nodding ensued as we awaited his response.)
Imagine my shock when the fella scowled, growled something unintelligible, and shuffled back into his house. The dismissive slam of his porch door sent a clear message, "Leave me alone, you nosy lady!"
We all stood with eyes wide in disbelief. Suddenly, Frank and the girls burst into gales of uncontrollable laughter. He pulled my forlorn self into a comforting bear hug.
That one incident continues to lead to family members waving randomly at walls or fences and crooning, "How are y'all doing?!" Then everyone bursts into laughter.
Okay, I get it. Not everyone wants to be friendly. But I haven't let that one little obstacle stand in my way! My calling is clear - greet the neighbors and let them know you want to connect.
So as I walk, I wave and talk to those showing any interest whatsoever.
But I also pray. I pray over the homes of people I don't even know. I figure that if the Lord brings the house to my attention, there's a reason. The occupants may need courage or hope. Their marriage may be in trouble or their children may be struggling. He knows.
Believe it or not, when I say hello, some neighbors still give a response similar to that of the guy in Asheville. Some people hear me but turn and walk in the other direction. Some wave in return but quickly look away indicating to me, "Don't talk to me!"
I inadvertently called one neighbor "Steve" for a while. He stopped me one day and snapped, "KEITH!"
"What did you say?" I asked with my biggest, engaging smile.
"My name is KEITH! Not Steve." He glared at me.
"Oh, I'm so sorry. Um, I'll try to remember for next time I see you, Keith. Thanks." I walked away a little hurt and started repeating for myself, "Keith with teeth. Keith with teeth."
Word association games help me remember names. "Keith with teeth" worked beautifully. And about six months later, my short chats and quick hellos yielded a great opportunity. "Keith with teeth" had a serious family need. (Apparently all our nearest neighbors refer to Frank as "The Preacher.") Keith asked that Frank and I pray for his family.
We stopped and prayed right there in the driveway!
One of the "look away" fellas finally waved last year. I considered that as another major break-through. Then about six months ago, we learned his mother had died and that he felt totally alone.
It hasn't led to dinner yet (he turned that invitation down.) But he does greet us first now. Some of our Sunday evening strolls have turned into lengthy conversations about hunting or fishing or travel; whatever is on his mind. And he even went so far as to tease a little recently.
I have a list on my refrigerator of all the neighbors I can name. It reminds me to pray for them.
Faith is a special needs student I met on an early morning walk. Extremely shy, it was hard for her to look at me the first few times I said hello.
But eventually, I would round the corner and find her waving eagerly and calling out, "Hello! Hello! How are you?" She would almost bubble. Faith and her family moved away this summer. I find myself still praying for her as I pass her former home.
Who knew that just walking could yield so many opportunities to let people know they matter? Oh, wait. I think there was Someone else who discovered this form of ministry long before me. Like 2000 years ago.
Try taking a look around your own "neighborhood" with new eyes. It doesn't matter whether you're more comfortable with Hello! Hi Y'all! Howdy! or a simple Good Morning! The important thing is that you just walk......and find a way to let others know you care.
Saturday, September 26, 2015
Listening and Learning
Is it possible that we're entering the final quarter of the year?!
Christmas carols are playing in our office already! I don't think I'm ready just yet. But ready or not - here we go! Life around these parts is moving quickly. Once school started, we were "Game On!"
Since I haven't had time to write a special blog post, I've just included another story from the book I'm working on. This chapter talks about the importance of being a person who listens carefully to others. Hope you enjoy the story:
1Thessalonians 4:11, “And make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: you should mind your own business.” Boy that’s pretty direct isn’t it? “Mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you.”
Christmas carols are playing in our office already! I don't think I'm ready just yet. But ready or not - here we go! Life around these parts is moving quickly. Once school started, we were "Game On!"
Since I haven't had time to write a special blog post, I've just included another story from the book I'm working on. This chapter talks about the importance of being a person who listens carefully to others. Hope you enjoy the story:
Dear
friends, some of us only communicate one way. We need to be listening more
than we’re speaking.
Right
after college, I shared an apartment with a great young lady named Tricia. Tricia knew the power of silence. Tricia was
a gift to me that I didn’t like.
You
see, I was very out going and bubbly. I was also very bad about saying what everyone else in the circle was
thinking. You know those people? Everybody is standing around, talking and
suddenly there’s this hesitant pause.
Invariably, someone jumps in with, “Blah, blah, blah!”
Everyone
else, embarrassed, begins looking around with a shocked expression. A few giggle nervously. Some cover their mouths.
The
blatant one announces, “What?! You were
all thinking it but you just didn’t have the nerve to say it!"
Well
that was me! Until Tricia…...
Tricia taught me that in situations like that,
everyone else had enough sense to keep their mouth shut. But not me! Oh, no! I had to just say it right out. I
felt compelled to say it. What I had marked as bravery, Tricia explained was
stupidity!
One
day, I went to Tricia and was telling her about a plan I had. “I think it would
be smart for me to……blah, blah, blah!”
(I can’t even remember the details of the plan now.)
Tricia
just stood and looked at me, with this sweet smile. Not fake, it was a sweet smile but because
she didn’t say, “Uh huh! That’s a great
idea!”, I felt compelled to help her
understand the value of this wonderful plan.
Really,
it wasn’t a great plan but I just wanted her to agree and help me move forward
in it. So I persisted, “And this is what
I want to do.”
Trish
just kept looking at me. Which started to aggravate the daylights out of me. I
mean even if you don’t agree, just say, “Ok!” and go on.
No,
no, no… Trish was helping me. And I didn’t want to be helped.
I babbled all over myself trying to convince
her about my idea. But she understood
the power of silence. She patiently
listened until I talked myself out of a potentially disastrous situation.
Tricia,
a lifetime friend, taught me the important lesson that listeners learn.
Scripture has a little something to say about this too.
1Thessalonians 4:11, “And make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: you should mind your own business.” Boy that’s pretty direct isn’t it? “Mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you.”
In another version that first part reads, "Study to be QUIET!" (Emphasis mine.)
Some days, I have to literally lay a finger over my lips to keep myself from speaking too quickly. But oh the things I've learned over the years by simply listening more than I talk.
Monday, September 21, 2015
The Right Season
Dear Friends,
I have not fallen off the face of the earth! But I HAVE been talking with a knowledgeable person about a book. As in, writing one. As in, being a published author. As in, having my face and name on the cover. As in...... Well, you get the idea.
These conversations have been interesting/informative. But this month they got a little scarey; they wanted to see some material. That meant I had to hustle to transcribe a sermon and polish it up a bit. After multiple days of long hours, I finally hit the "Send" button.
That small act felt a lot like hitting the post button for this blog the first time. "What will people think? Will they enjoy reading what I've written? Will it benefit anyone?" And the worst thought of all, "Will they say it's nice only to keep from hurting my feelings?!" Sigh!
Putting your thoughts on paper and handing them to others for consideration can be frightening!
The story below is one I used to illustrate a point in the sermon transcription I sent the publisher. Let me know what you think. And thank you for continuing to check in on Embrace the Grace!
I have not fallen off the face of the earth! But I HAVE been talking with a knowledgeable person about a book. As in, writing one. As in, being a published author. As in, having my face and name on the cover. As in...... Well, you get the idea.
These conversations have been interesting/informative. But this month they got a little scarey; they wanted to see some material. That meant I had to hustle to transcribe a sermon and polish it up a bit. After multiple days of long hours, I finally hit the "Send" button.
That small act felt a lot like hitting the post button for this blog the first time. "What will people think? Will they enjoy reading what I've written? Will it benefit anyone?" And the worst thought of all, "Will they say it's nice only to keep from hurting my feelings?!" Sigh!
Putting your thoughts on paper and handing them to others for consideration can be frightening!
The story below is one I used to illustrate a point in the sermon transcription I sent the publisher. Let me know what you think. And thank you for continuing to check in on Embrace the Grace!
(Please remember this is from a sermon I preached. The story explains why I believe that life is a journey with many twists, turns and decisions to be made along the way.)
This
journey is also full of seasons. In
Galatians 6:9 we read, “Do
not become weary in doing good, you will reap in due season if you do not give
up.”
You will reap. Some of you need to jot that down.
Ecclesiastes 3:1, “For
everything there is a season.”
The concept of “seasons” is especially true for women. I’ve always enjoyed working with women. Teaching Bible studies; leading prayer
groups; planning events; speaking for conferences and retreats. I love it all!
As a very young pastor’s wife, our state women’s director
took me under her wing and began to train me. She added me to her team of leaders and I
blossomed!
When you combine my work ethic, my delight in helping others
and her need for youthful excitement on her team – well, you get the picture. It was meant to be a great situation. But when you allow giftings to get out of
balance, they become a train wreck in the making.
I began spending longer and longer hours working on the
various projects. Juggling here and
there to create time. Sometimes the
events required that I be away from home for several days. Frank helped when he could. But most often, I
stole time for these efforts from my girls.
“Don’t bother me right now, Sweetie. Mom’s making calls about the next
meeting.” “I’ll take care of that
later. There’s a deadline for
this!” “You just watch this one short
movie and I’ll be finished.”
And that was mild.
More often, I simply had no reserve energy left for being patient with
the most important gifts God had given to me.
I smiled and taught and listened to everyone else. I worked to meet the needs of everyone else
before offering those same attentions to my family.
After a few years of this, there came a season change. God began gently speaking to me about
resigning my spot on the leadership team.
I knew His voice. I recognized
His nudge.
But instead of obeying, I negotiated. “I’ll ask to be cut back on my responsibilities. The director won’t mind that. I love being part of this team, Lord! It’s a great ministry outlet for me. Surely, YOU meant for me to serve here. You made me a leader by nature. YOU provided this opportunity!”
And so it went. But
God saw much further down the road than I could see. He heard my deepest prayer – to have a
healthy family. And He knew I couldn’t
achieve that on the path I was traveling.
Jacob’s wrestling match with the angel looked a lot like
what I was experiencing as I tried to find a compromise point.
“Lord, please! Don’t
ask me to give this up. This opportunity
may never come my way again.”
Finally, a friend dropped by to visit me one afternoon. I stopped everything in order to give her my
full attention. The visit was so
unexpected. I knew she must have some serious need that would require my best
advice and most intense prayer!
She wasted no time in getting right to the point. “Sheri,” she looked me right in the eye. “I’ve been sent here by the Lord to tell you
something.”
It wasn’t exactly the opening I’d imagined; but she had my
attention.
“There is something you’re supposed to give up. And it’s important that you do it right
away. He hasn’t told me what it is. I just know this is urgent. That’s why I had to see you today.”
Tears sprang to my eyes and began to roll onto my blushing
cheeks.
She reached for my hand, afraid she had offended me. “Are you okay?”
“I know exactly what I have to give up, Diane. I’ve been struggling with it because I don’t want
to. But this helps me know I must
obey. Thank you for taking the risk of
talking with me like this.”
My friend prayed for me, then left. I picked up the phone right away and called
the women’s director to resign my post.
Peace flooded my heart.
For about seven years, I had nothing to do with women’s
ministry. It was a quiet; dormant time
for me. Not easy at all. But I knew my choice had been the right one.
I didn’t understand about seasons then. I thought I would never serve in that
capacity ever again. But remember, obedience to God is always rewarded!
I have now travelled all over this country and to many
foreign nations preaching and teaching.
I’ve worked with larger groups and experienced so much more as a leader
than I could ever have imagined then.
Obedience in that season brought a more
bountiful harvest in this season!
(Hope you found some encouragement in this story. I'd love to hear your thoughts.)
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